From Krypton and Back Again

We had an eventful weekend. Yesterday, G-Dawg ran into our room telling us that he had made us some candy. You'd think that I would get used to G-Dawg's rude awakenings, but no, I still have a heart attack at 7am when G-Dawg yells in my face "I made you some candy!" The "candy" was pretty much every small toy he has stuffed into the back of Mr Potato Head. These small toys will become important in my tale later. So we got up, grudgingly, and went to the kitchen for breakfast while G-Dawg showed us the contents of Mr. Potato Head which really reminded me of Mary Poppins bag, it still gets me when I see her pull out that huge lamp. Anyway, a few minutes later G-Dawg has this expression of anguish on his face and says, "I'm choking on my kryptonite!" (see picture for reference) As we all know if you can talk you aren't choking but choking or not the kryptonite had just been swallowed and G-Dawg was crying and kept saying, "I want it back!" I called the pediatrician right away and he thought it could just go through (ouch if you ask me) but he told me to have G-Dawg drink something and see what happens. I gave him some milk and G-Dawg exclaimed, "Oh, the Kryptonite is coming back." When the pediatrician heard that he said he was afraid it was stuck and that we should go the hospital. When we got to Primary's the receptionist asked G-Dawg his name and he said matter-of-factly, "My name is Gage and I swallowed Superman's Kryptonite." As you can imagine he charmed most of the staff from there. The doctor that talked to us first was a 1st year resident and he was a guy we went to High School with and he lived in our old ward, you should know him Roper, Christian Neff. Anyway, he was examining G-Dawg and G-Dawg says so seriously, "What kind of Doctor are you?" He kept us laughing when he told his nurse that he was going to be Peter Pan for Halloween and when she asked if he could fly he said, "No, I need pixie dust to do that!" Later, as in hours, we found out, via an x-ray, that the Krypotnite had passed into the stomach and that all we can do is hope it comes out in the wash or toilet, whichever euphemism you prefer. They do digital x-rays now days so we were looking at it with the tech and you didn't need a degree to see the huge piece of kryptonite in the middle of the x-ray. The doctor told us that the radiologist called her and was asking what he was looking at on the x-ray and she told him Kryptonite and then he said, "oh, no wonder I was felling weak while I was reading it!" Really, the people at that hospital are wonderful and we are so glad it isn't more serious. G-Dawg hopes that the Kryptonite comes out red but I'm just hoping it comes out.

We also had our annual Halloween party at my parent's house. It was fun! My oldest sister is a big Pres Bush hater and she has a mask of him that she thinks is scarier than any other mask around. She was more than a little mad when G-Dawg put it on exclaiming that he (Pres Bush)
was, "a good guy!" Those of you who know her know this burned her up. Too funny. L-Dawg was a dog for Halloween and he looks so cute and he loves my parent's dog, Kaylee. (what kind of name is that anyway for a dog?)

Ding Dong the Program's Over

If there is a little extra spring in my step it is because the Primary Program is over!! I didn't even have to hide under the organ, as I threatened one friend I would do, before it was over. I was thrust into full panic mode yesterday when I went to the Saturday practice and more than half the kids were missing and the pianist suddenly acted like she had no idea what was going on and started playing all this extra stuff. Sure, it was pretty but really lady my leading skills are pretty limited. This coupled with what can only be described as vacant drug induced stares from everybody had me scrambling to copy the music for the teachers (equally if not more vacant than the kids...seriously kids stay in school) and making yet more props for the songs that we have been singing all freakin year. By Sunday morning I was frazzled and don't ask me how when I laid out all of the kids clothes (and T-Dawgs too! wink wink) packed both Sunday bags, and even shaved my legs the night before that we still barely made church in time. Thankfully, though I think the program went pretty well, even though most of the stares stayed the same and not once did the kids stand up together. T-Dawg kept me laughing because he keep waving L-Dawg's hand at me while I was on the stand and by the end of sacrament meeting L-Dawg had all but eaten T-Dawg's tie.

At lunch today G-Dawg asked his Dad why we were married.

T-Dawg said, "Because we love each other very much."
G-Dawg, "Why do you love each other?"
T-Dawg, "I love mom because she is so nice and pretty." (not two words I have ever used to describe myself...you big flatterer)
G-Dawg, "But why is so pretty?"
T-Dawg, "Because she has beautiful hair and face and pretty eyes."
Then G-Dawg looked at me sideways and I have suspected him to declare that none of this was true and then he said,
"and she has a great smile!"

Whoever said that motherhood doesn't have its rewards?

The Long and Winding Road to Nintendo Ownership

In the cupboard under our TV sits three Nintendos. The first I brought to the marriage, it is the original NES and in my humble opinion the best Nintendo. This is the very Nintendo my Dad bought for us kids when it came out in the 80's. Ownership was then transfered to my oldest brother and his kids. I spent some time with my Bro and his family in Massachusetts before I was married and then on a return visit with T-Dawg they gave the Nintendo to me as I have taken the most joy out of the games and kids these days just don't get the old school stuff. This is where a bit of controversy comes into play. My other brother (Roper) claims that this Nintendo was given to just him and that my mom had no right to give it to my other brother and that my claim on said Nintendo is nothing more than a gift from one thief to another. But since I shoved it in my carry-on and dragged it across the freakin country and lovingly taped one of the controllers back together I say it is mine. If love of the Nintendo was determined by how well one could play the games I would challenge Roper, anytime anyplace, to a game of Super Mario Bros 1, 2, or 3 and I'm sure things would land in my favor. Anyway, back to the three Nintendos next we have the Nintendo 64. This represents one of the lamest presents T-Dawg gave me while we were dating. Tell me why when it was a present for me that I sat for hours and watched T-Dawg play? Ahem. Finally we have the Nintendo Game Cube, a Christmas present for T-Dawg when I was preggers with G-Dawg. We have faithfully played all of these systems and I have to say my joy was complete. But T-Dawg, being the techo geek he is, longed for something more. He has wanted a Nintendo DS Lite for quite awhile. But if you review the history of all the previous Nintendos you will find that they represent luxuries one is afforded before you have 2 kids, (with huge appetite's might I add) a mortgage, and a stay at home wife. The Game Cube just barely made it since I was with child when we got it. With all our responsibilities we couldn't (really just me) justify buying one. So, T-Dawg has had to content himself with owning Nintendo Stock rather than the playthings they manufacture. Some of you may be thinking, didn't the stock cost a lot more than the dumb DS Lite? While that is true the stock has gained like 200% since we bought it and the DS Lite would just be worthless, never-mind that is my econ mind speaking. The point of this long drawn out analysis is that T-Dawg has not been daunted by my repeated refusal to buy a DS. He went out and found a way to get one for free. That's right free. He entered a contest to, "create your own crazy-cool image of Donkey Kong® at his climbing best and you could win your very own Nintendo DS™ Lite, plus a copy of the brand new DK Jungle Climber!" Well, what do you know he WON!!! I guess the thousands we spent on art school wasn't for nothing. Way to go T-Dawg!! Below is the winning image. I know T-Dawg would want full disclosure that 7 other people won too. I'm so proud that T-Dawg could beat out the competition of Jr High School kids armed with nothing more than makers and white paper! No seriously, there were lots of good entries but T-Dawg's was one of only a handful of original artwork and his was really a standout! Now if he could only find a way to win the Nintendo WII our collection would be complete save the Super NES, which was just a lame add on to the original.

Everything I missed in 6th grade.

I have often wondered if in, say 6th grade, all the girls got separated from the boys and were taught certain things. No not that meeting...that one I went to and fully understand. I think in this particular meeting they were taught how to cut paper in a straight line and how to make things pleasing to the eye and maybe how to apply eye liner, again in a straight line. I either was absent this day or I was daydreaming about my 6th grade crush John Upi. (He and I played footsies on my first kindergarten field trip and I harbored feelings for him all through elementary school. We had a brief "relationship" in 6th grade and then we were torn apart as he and I went to different junior high schools. His dad ran for the state senate and I think he won and I think by High School John was doing drugs so I'm glad it didn't work out) But I digress, about this meeting I missed, well it never affected my life. After all, I graduated from college got married and even had a pretty decent job but wham! then I became a mother and you are supposed to make these things called scrapbooks for your kids. This is when skills like cutting in a straight line come in handy and alas I can't do it. You think I'm kidding or you're thinking she just needs a slicer but I assure you I am not kidding and I have a slicer and my cuts are just as ski wampy as a 1st grader's with safety scissors. In fact, I think maybe a 1st grader could do better! I have asked my friend Jenn, who is a super scrapbooker, several times to teach a class that I would gladly attend, heck I'd even pay to attend, and I think that she thinks I'm just being complimentary. But if she saw my pitiful scrapbooks she would know that this is a code blue emergency. I don't even have the solace of blaming this on my mom because my sister can make scrapbooks and when she lived here I would con her into "helping" but that really meant just doing pages for G-Dawg's scrapbook. These are the best pages in G-Dawg's book. Then she moved and the pages that I did on my own practically shout at you "I suck" and then thankfully T-Dawg started helping me and those are better. But honestly I can already see the future and I'm not even clairvoyant. One day I will hand over these books, that have been such a struggle for me to make, to my two boys and they couldn't care less because they are men after all. Then they will marry perfectly normal women, who can cut in a straight line, and they will want their baby books and when they see them they will laugh out loud and ask their husbands if their mom does indeed have imposable thumbs or if I was kidnapped from the ape house at the zoo!

Onto the family update. This week G-Dawg discovered this new show on PBS called Super Why that he loves. I couldn't be happier because this show is about reading and letters and such and I think that since he can practically quote Peter Pan it was time to move onto something a bit more educational. He plans on being Peter Pan for Halloween and I'm worried since all this week he as been Super Wyatt with reading power (as seen in Super Why) that Peter Pan won't be cool by the time Halloween comes. The one good part about this whole Super Why thing is that I get to be Super Red (she looks like a edgy little red riding hood with roller skates and she has spelling power) I've never been a good speller so I'm channeling this character while I wear G-Dawg's red cape that slightly chokes me.

L-Dawg is a lover of all things paper. He is like a moth to flame burned by the fire (oh wait that's Madonna) He is drawn to it like a moth to the flame. To get paper he will do anything he has to do and then I'll find him happily chewing it to pieces. I always feel bad taking it away because he cries big tears when I do. He also discovered that I play guitar and I think he is on his road to becoming my biggest fan. So far he likes the upbeat tunes as opposed to the love ballads. It just struck me that maybe why he likes the guitar so much is because he has been munching on the my music?!


Conference weekend has been really good. The weather has been depressing so you really have no other activities to distract you from watching. I think the talks have been excellent. We had our traditional girls night at my sister's-in-law place while the men attended Priesthood. There was a bit of scene when G-Dawg and his youngest girl cousin, B-Dawg, were left alone upstairs too long. Let's just say that B-Dawg performed a small act of service for G-Dawg that involved the toilet and number 2 and her Lip Smackers. I laughed so hard I cried and to be honest I was really grossed out. They both had baths. The Lip Smacker is in the trash.