Sewing Lessons

My mother-in-law started giving me sewing lessons when I bought my sewing machine. I've really been enjoying them and I've been making a tote that I can take to the library. The fabric I chose is kind of vintage looking and has roosters on it. My niece has coined it the "chicken bag." So today I was working on my chicken bag (on carol's machine since mine is broken...see below post) and Carol was telling me all these stories about her childhood and the early years of her marriage. Carol, in the past, has not been really up front with these kinds of details and I was amazed at how easy our conversation was flowing. I feel like one of the consequences of the "home arts" disappearing in our modern society is that we are losing the close relationships that were fostered among women and the passing on of personal histories. I have this picture in my mind about the good old days of quilting circles and the friends in the circle that you've known forever and would do anything for and I want that. I may have to settle for re-reading my favorite book about a quilting circle during The Great Depression.

I Was Put In Time-Out

My camera is sick and hopefully will be working by Halloween. Since I haven't had any good pictures to post for awhile I thought I would explain...the kids look mostly the same. Gage has had this great revelation in his life that he can be disobedient....yippee for me. He has been so danged obedient most of his life until recently. The apex of his naughtiness was earlier in this week when he broke the presser foot on my sewing machine after I had asked him to leave it alone about 100 times. I was so angry that words cannot describe and thankfully I was on the phone with Andrea and she suggested that I go outside before there was bloodshed. My blood boiled further when he said I was just going to have to buy another one. Then I started to cry (angry bitter tears) and said that I couldn't replace it and that I had wanted one for a long time. Of course, sweet Gage started to cry and I thought it was because I had to cancel a play date with Mason to punish him. I went in his room when I had cooled down to talk, really I mean lecture, and he was crying and I asked why. He said sobbing, "I'm not crying because I can't play with Mason I'm crying because I broke it!!! And you've wanted one for a long time." I forgave him after that.

Every day after school I try and pry details about what Gage did at school and of course I come up with nothing until one day I asked him if anyone got into trouble. He has two kids in his class that act up quite a bit so I was getting all the juicy details about school just by asking if anyone got put into time-out. A few weeks ago Gage had told me that he was a good boy and that, "he noticed he never got put into time out." I was happy to hear that. Well today I asked the routine question expecting to hear the usual, but Gage had this evil glint in his eye and said, "Actually I got put in time-out today." He sounded so pleased with himself I had no idea what to say. Apparently he had argued with another boy (the boy who is usually in time-out) over something and they both got sent to time out. The look on his face was so funny and foreign to me. He's never been so devilish. This is uncharted territory. Help.

Awww Tender

The kids have been driving me crazy lately. Luke is uncontainable. Whilst I'm cleaning up one disaster he's creating another one. I used to flatter myself that I was this great mom because Gage never threw tantrums, never screamed to get what he wanted, never got into things he wasn't supposed to. That shows how truly dull I really am because it had nothing to do with me and everything to do with his personality. Which, by the way, his preschool teacher tells me he is independent and conscientious but prone to worry...wonder where he got that from hmm? Gage is constantly haggling his brother and refuses to share and I could swear the child is deaf as he will do nothing I ask him to do!!!

Yesterday, in the midst of practically losing my mind I took the kids into the backyard and told them to play and being the cold hard woman that I am I locked the gate behind me in spite of Luke's hysterical crying. I'm also a wimp so the second I got inside I went to the window so I could see how they were doing. The scene was wonderful, Gage was hugging Luke and telling him that it was going to be okay and then he proceeded to tell him that it was cold out and zipped up his coat for him. Luke, who never lets his brother touch him without screaming in protest, stopped crying instantly and was hugging him back. It really made my whole day. If you've never been there I'm sure it is weird to think that one small instant in your kid's life can make up for the spray glue that Luke sprayed in Gage's room, or the broken picture frame, or the 100 time I'd asked Gage to do his car seat straps but somehow it does and it feels like a miracle every time.

Free Range Kids?

I saw this lady on Dr. Phil (okay there was nothing else on) who let her 10 year old son take the subway, by himself, from some shopping trip and she had written about it online and of course the helicopter moms went berserk on her calling her a horrible mother. I tended to agree until I watched her and listened to what she was saying. She thinks that as parents we are too involved and constantly hovering over our children. We see predators behind every corner. We fight all our kids battles for them. We don't allow our children any freedom and thereby rob them of independence. She says the best way to protect our children is to teach them to protect themselves. By the time she was done I was really seeing it her way. Obviously, you have to take into account a child's age and maturity but when I was a kid I went to the store by myself, however far I could go on my bike was my playground, I walked to school, not a short distance, with my brother (I remember Nate that you taught me the days of the week and North, South, East, and West.) I was only almost kidnapped once...and my parents didn't freak out and drive me everywhere. I clearly remember the scream lesson they gave me that night and the lesson I learned on being thankful my dad listened to the spirit and that I can't trust every adult simply because they are one. I agree with her that we are raising a generation of kids that can't think for themselves because we never let them fail (hello trophies for every kid...gotta love the participation trophy...I remember when a trophy meant something) It really made me examine my parenting. If you're interested in her there is a link on my blog roll to her blog called free range kids. Don't expect to see Gage and Luke going on walks by themselves around the neighborhood but in small ways I'm trying to teach Gage to take care of himself that didn't occur to me before. Instead of insisting on his hand in the parking lot and expounding on how children can get hit if they are in the road I've stopped holding his hand and teaching him to watch for cars himself. What good is teaching him to look both ways before he crosses the street if he never gets to cross by himself? Of course I'm in range to grab him if it isn't safe but he doesn't realize that. This is way is so much harder for me than doing it all myself but that's how I know it's right.

Kids are Weird...Especially Mine

We made our yearly visit to the Primary Children's Emergency room yesterday. Last year it was because Gage had swallowed Superman's Krytonite and the year before that for the Rotavirius.

Friday night Gage was at an indoor amusement park, for little kids, and went on a ride that was like the tea cups at Disneyland. The only difference was that while the ride was going in a circle the operator spun the cups and when Gage got on he asked if he wanted to go fast. Well, the kid is 4 and he said yes but neither he nor I thought that meant the mock 10 speed this guy was spinning them at. About half way through the ride I saw that Gage's head was thrown back and that he was crying. I thought he was getting nauseous so I wasn't too worried. Despite kids crying the operator just kept spinning them...not the best and brightest working there I can tell you that. When Gage got off the ride he said he thought his head was going to break off. I felt bad that I didn't realize that his head was back because he could not lift it up not because he was having fun. Gage was a little subdued after the ride and he wasn't interested in dinner or cake and the second we got in the car he started crying and saying that his head really hurt. When we got home I gave him so Motrin and put him to bed all the while him grabbing his head and saying it hurt inside his body. He got up during the night saying it hurt and by the morning he looked horrible. He wouldn't eat anything and was still complaining of his head hurting, his eyes were bloodshot, his cheeks flushed and he felt warm to me. I was starting to get worried that his brain was scrambled and I had visions of his brain swelling inside his skull. Um, I have an active imagination. Although I reasoned that he was perfectly fine before the ride and I traced all his symptoms back to the ride. So I called the doctor and he thought he probably needed a CT Scan so we should go up to Primary.

We saw a resident first and she said that Gage had whip lash and some muscle strain in his abdomen but that her attending would be in to look at him. The attending came and while she was examining him she pressed under his jaw and Gage freaked out in pain. Holding his breath and crying...I felt so bad and then he was saying, "Mom I don't like them doing that!" So the attending says that Gage has strep?! They did the rapid strep test and it came back negative but she felt positive because he had a headache, stomach ache, sore neck that she sent us home with antibiotics. So the whole thing was a fluke. She said that he strained his muscles where it hurts with strep anyway and that the ride made him more aware that he didn't' feel well. The whole thing is so weird. He seems to be feeling a little bit better today but I don't know if that is because of the Motrin or the antibiotics and I'm supposed to call tomorrow to see if his culture grew strep. If it comes back negative then I'll really be flummoxed. What will it be next year? Your guess is as good as mine.

Being Postive

Last week I watched some of the General Relief Society Conference. I know my out of state family and friends will think I'm a loser that I can't even watch the whole thing when it is broadcast into my home. But, what I did hear I really enjoyed and I really liked President Uchtdorf's talk on happiness. He pointed out that women are hard on themselves and tend to focus on the negative...when it comes to themselves. I thought I'd find something positive to share for us lovely ladies who sometimes feel bad about ourselves. Okay, I mean me. I may do this more often to balance out my negative posts.

God planted within women something divine
that expresses itself in quiet strength, in refinement,
in peace, in goodness, in virtue, in truth, in love.

President Gordon B. Hinckley


We are in the habit of erecting monuments to men. I want to tell you as I stand here tonight
the most enduring monuments in this world have been erected in the home by women.
I feel to say tonight that I love my father - no man could love his father more - but when I think of the influence of my mother when I was a little tad I am moved to reverence and tears.

George Albert Smith

Political Activisim

I did something last week I've never done before. I wrote my congressman. Amazingly he wrote back. With the Wall Street Bailout set to pass, against the will of the people, I felt compelled for the first time to make my voice heard. It is something that I think I will continue to do as I think grass roots politics is the best and most important place to start. My brother, who inspired my letter, asked to see the response so I thought I'd share it on my blog.

My letter,

Congressman Matheson,

I think as a nation we are facing a crossroads of monumental proportions. It is amazing to me that the Senate, against the will of their constituents, passed a revision of the bill you voted against. I think it is time that our representatives in Washington recognized their obligation to the voters who put them there. I urge you to have the courage to vote against this new Bailout Bill. Now is not the time to rush to legislation that may do more harm than good. This type of bill, with such a high price tag, should not be entered in to under an umbrella of fear. Please proceed with caution as you consider your vote and recognize that your first allegiance belongs to your voters and not to a political party. I voted for you because I have confidence in your judgment and I hope that confidence was well placed.

Sincerly,
Mrs. Pudge

I received his reply the next day, sadly the bill did pass but he did not vote for it. Obviously this is a form letter but I was impressed that he even bothered. That's how little I expect from our elected leaders.

October 3, 2008
Dear Mrs. Pudge,

Thank you for sharing your concerns regarding the current financial crisis. I appreciate your interest in this important issue.

Over the past two years, we've witnessed the effects of a growing financial crisis. While the Administration has bailed out some companies, others have failed, throwing the market into greater uncertainty. At this point, Fannie Mae, Freddie Mac, and AIG are all essentially owned by the federal government. In a perfect world, the government will realize a positive fiscal contribution from the recent interventions. However, the government may also suffer significant losses, as has occurred in the past.

The credit markets are frozen. Although this sounds like an issue that only matters to large businesses, the availability of credit affects all of us. We all want to send our children to college, buy a home for our families, and look for opportunities to expand our businesses. Without access to credit and financial institutions, it's just not possible for most of us to be able to afford these things on our own. We all rely upon access to the credit markets and the system has stopped working.

Just a few weeks ago, historic bank failures and worries about the stock market showed further deterioration in the financial sector. The Administration responded by asking Congress for $700 billion in order to allow the Treasury Department to selectively bail out some private companies. This idea came in the form of a 3-page bill, which was simply not enough to address the problem.

The bailout envisioned by the Administration violated the principles of good government. Congress did insist on some important taxpayer protections in comparison to the original bill written by the Administration, which sought to spend $700 billion overnight without any oversight. While I respect the efforts of many leaders of both parties to find the right solution, I was unconvinced that this plan will solve the larger crisis and I voted against it.

The current crisis represents a difficult time in U.S. history. I take the situation very seriously and I have concerns about the state of our economy. I am also very concerned about the effect of this crisis on Utahns and the possible long-term effects on all Americans. We cannot just write another blank check that will have to eventually be backed up by money the government will have to borrow.

The U.S. Senate eventually passed a version of the bill that contains extraneous provisions that are both expensive and poorly thought out. At a cost of $850 billion, most of the new provisions were added to sweeten the pot. One provision also changes financial accounting rules which were put in place after the 1980's savings and loan crisis, the last major national financial crisis.

I opposed the bailout bill because it simply does not address the underlying causes of the financial crisis. The bill will soon be signed into law by the President. I still hope that this bill will do some good, even though I fear that it is not enough to solve the problem. With that in mind, I believe that Congress must return early next year and it must address true reform of a financial system that allowed private companies to make such bad business decisions, at the expense of their shareholders and ultimately, of taxpayers.

Again, thank you for sharing your concerns with me. If you have any additional questions, please feel free to contact my office.

Sincerely,

JIM MATHESON
Member of Congress